NHS England is banning super-sized chocolate bars from hospital shops, introducing a 250 calorie limit for sweets, a 400 calorie limit for pre-packed sandwiches, and a 5 gram added sugar limit per 100ml of drinks. At this rate it won’t be long before people don’t want to be in hospital anymore.
It has been revealed that a patient in Dumfries and Galloway was kept in hospital for 508 days in 2013/14, waiting for a discharge. He has since been signed to appear in the latest Viagra advert.
As pressures in the NHS continue to increase, it is reported that even the best hospitals are “now struggling to see patients”.
This is particularly bad news for Moorfields Eye Hospital.
The Surrey Mirror (Thursday 4 September) has a story headlined “Fire crew cut ring off of man’s penis”.
It reports that firefighters were deployed to the local hospital to remove a ring that had got stuck on a man in his 60s. I quote:
“Firefighters spent an hour removing the offending item after selecting the most appropriate tool for the job.”